Monday, September 2, 2013

A Humbled Plea

Ive been keeping a little secret to myself the past week and half. 

See, I was doing very well health wise.  I was living, I was traveling, I was DIYing. 

For 9 weeks I improved and it was perfect timing.  For we were all concerned how I would "turn out" at my sisters wedding.

And go figure...I was able to dance (like hardcore didnt leave the dance floor), walk down the long isle in 3.5" Michael Kors wedged sandals, give my MOH speech in 90% my own voice, last the entire wedding week/weekend festivities.  It was a huge blessing.

We figured I would crash some and I did.  I spent time recovering.  But I still didnt feel as sick as I was in the spring.  I felt healthier, I myself.

But, just like all the stories in the past 17 months, I relapsed.  We gave it through the weekend to see if it was just due to stress/tired/etc.  Monday came and I was only worse.

The doctors dont know what to do.  My tremors aren't controlled by typical MS medicine.  I dont respond to steroids and my last plasma exchange only provided relief for a few short days.  It's a shot in the dark and honestly, I feel the doctors are as helpless as me. 

This post is difficult for me to write, both physically and emotionally.

As you might know, we have a team for Bike MS: City to Shore.  Last year we were able to raise over $12,000 for this cause.

This year we, team sparkle - consisting of my dad and three brothers and if I can myself, are signed up to bike again. 

It is very challenging for me to fundraise.  As much as I believe in this cause, I dont like asking people for their hard earned money.

Which brings us to the topic of this post: humbled. 

I am humbling asking you to consider donating to Bike MS as well as passing the information along. 

I must first recognize those that have donated; thank you so much for your generous donations!

The honest, humbled truth is I wish more than anything we didnt have to participate in this race, that I didnt have to ask for money.  I wish that my affiliation with MS was from afar, not in your face.

People donate their money, their time, their efforts, their energy for this cause, for me.  And as grateful as I am, I'd do anything to walk away. 

But I cant get away from it.  Shit I cant even walk. 

Which is why this race is important, despite everything.  Because the money raised helps find better drugs, better research answers and hopefully one day, a cure. 

Right now we are no where near our goal number.  And as mentioned before, I really dont like fundraising. 

But I humbly (there's that word again) ask you to consider donating.  If anything, just $5.  Just to remind me I'm not alone.  That even though I have MS, I'm still worth it. 

Thank you very much; I will never be able to express my gratitude.  Except for maybe throwing a huge sparkle party for all those that donate. (you in?)


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